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The Parent Trap

If parents are supposed to be their children's primary faith influencers, then why not require them to serve in children's ministry? Two different views; two different approaches.


Sign 'Em Up!

I remember the first time my wife and I had to walk into our pastor's office and say: "We need to talk about a real challenge in our preschool ministry. We've tried everything."

With a concerned expression and no idea of the magnitude of what we were about to drop in his lap, he said, "Okay, sit down."

With research and numbers in hand, the picture we painted was bleak. "Very few people are willing to serve. Our rotation system is broken. We've prayed, been upbeat and positive, made personal contacts, advertised, even changed curriculum, but nothing seems to generate the kind of change we really need to motivate people to serve."

How many children's ministers have had that same conversation with their pastors, children's ministry teams, or other ministry leaders recently? Most realistic children's ministers are fully aware of the challenges we're up against.

For starters, we live in a convenience-driven, warp-speed world. Everything's fast--whether it's food, communication, shopping, or information. We're a culture driven by demand, and what most people demand is high-speed and efficiency. For many people, volunteering is a commitment that'll take at least some of their time--something many are unwilling or unable to give.

Add to that the daycare dilemma. For many, children's ministry is perceived as a daycare situation where everyone drops off their children for care and training and picks them up when the parents are done with their church activities. It's easy to forget that most of those who serve in children's ministry are volunteers--and that daycare isn't exactly what happens in our rooms.

It was with these two factors and the reality of our sparse volunteer roster in hand, that we sat down with our pastor and worked on clear-cut goals and ways to achieve them for our ministry. We also prayed--a lot.

• First Goal: We wanted to provide a ministry and outreach to parents so they can attend Sunday school, small group classes, and worship while their children experience Jesus' love in our classrooms.

Solution: To facilitate this type of specialized care for children and include strong spiritual instruction, we realized we needed "outside hands" to help with hands-on needs such as changing diapers, restroom breaks, snacks, crafts, and instruction. Our church is able to have some paid team members on hand to offer parents this opportunity.

• Second Goal: Our greatest desire was to provide devoted, trained teachers to teach God's Word to children each week.

Solution: We implemented a new team-teaching model for teachers. Four people team up to teach, with two teaching one Sunday and the other two the next. Knowing that children need consistency, this wasn't our first choice for teaching time. But at this juncture in our ministry, we needed major overhaul, and this was an appealing option for most volunteers. This setup allowed them to attend adult Sunday school twice per month, and the results have been higher levels of enthusiasm among our volunteers and a more positive image for our ministry to children.

• Third Goal: We sought parental involvement in their children's spiritual training, so that we as a church are partnering with parents to disciple children, not attempting the impossible: discipling their children for them.

Solution: We adopted a rather radical approach to accomplish this goal. We implemented a Parent Assistant Rotation, where all parents with children in the ministry would be required to serve. Our pastor gave a phenomenal message from the book of Exodus about "not leaving the children behind." At one point during the plagues God inflicted on Egypt, Pharaoh told Moses something like, "Fine, go yonder and worship, but leave your children here in Egypt."

Moses' response: "We're not leaving our children behind spiritually. It's our responsibility as parents to train our kids to love God and serve God." Our pastor then announced the new parent rotation system to the entire church. He announced that every parent with a child in the department would serve one hour per month--including him! For one full year, our pastor served in the 4-year-old class as a parent assistant.

So you ask, How does it work? When a family joins our church, they receive a letter from the preschool ministry director stating that they'll be added to the parent assistant rotation. They may choose the hour they'd like to serve, and if they strongly feel they can't, we make an appointment to discuss the situation. We understand there are times when a family just needs to be ministered to. All we ask is that parents contact us when they're able to serve. Each month parents receive a calendar with the schedule and the phone numbers of all the parents. If parents need to reschedule, they contact another parent on the schedule and switch, then let the ministry director know.

It's wonderful to see the changes that've taken place. God has brought us excellent teachers who teach God's Word faithfully each week. Some are parents; some are grandparents. Some are church members who heard God's call to invest in the lives of this future generation. The greatest reward is seeing the children run up to their teachers and parents and talk about all they're learning about Jesus, With God's blessing, this partnership is working.


Andrew and Tracy Orr are children's ministers at Philadelphia Baptist Church in Deville, Louisiana.

Opinion: "Sign 'Em Up!"

"We now ask parents who call [our church] their home to serve in children's ministry…We are confident that you will have deeper and richer conversations about faith with your kids if you learn beside them on Sunday mornings." -Heartland Community Church, Olathe, Kansas

"There's a need to help out in simple chores like getting snacks ready, helping during crafts time, storytime, etc. It's not necessarily about preparing to actually be a Sunday school teacher. If all parents helped out, what would it be? Once every 3 to 6 months…Talk about support and knowing what goes on!"-Melissa, Childrensministry.com poll response

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