Kids just want to have fun. They want to move their bodies —
they want to create things — they want to play games. And they
want to, well, eat. A lot! To every parent and teacher of children,
this information is old hat for sure. But we can’t forget that
while these kids are busy having all that fun, there’s a tremendous
opportunity for them to learn about themselves, others, life, and
Now that reminder call has to reach children’s ministry leaders
around the nation: “Church” and “Fun” must be synonymous! And
that’s just what a focus group of kids told Children’s Ministry
Magazine when we gave them the opportunity to tell us what they
want from church. What do they like and dislike? What keeps them
coming back? And most importantly, we wanted to determine what
would make them tell their unchurched friends, “I love my church!
It’s so fun! You oughta come with me some time!”
Keep It Coming
After multiple slices of pizza, countless sugar cookies, and a
river of juice boxes, our group of 6- to 11-year-olds held back
nothing while explaining what makes church enjoyable (and, although
they didn’t come right out and say so, educational) for them.
When asked what they like and what they want more of at church,
these kids had a lot of unanimous input. Even though their
respective ages had a five-year span, the key elements that kept
them happy and coming back didn’t differ much. (This is great news
for program developers! The main facets of programming can be the
same through the ages, just modify the theme’s
simplicity/complexity.) The “more of” could be boiled down to the
following four categories.
Activities top the priority list. Now, with
this one, you’re probably grinning with pride and recognition,
pulling out your “1,001 Bible Crafts” manual. But before you get
too excited, we’re talking active activities here. Although some
small-motor skills crafts are greatly appreciated (and what kid
doesn’t love to come home with a colorful bracelet or bookmark?),
there’s much more to consider. Running, jumping, climbing… big
movement stuff. And what’s even better than running, jumping, and
climbing? Games and skits that incorporate all that running,
jumping, and climbing, of course!
Music makes kids’ hearts sing… but put away the
hymnals. Kids want a fast, hip beat; repetitive lyrics
(for easy learning); and a little action. When they’re moving their
mouths to the music — and their arms and legs to solidify the
song’s meaning, kids are in heaven. (And the angels may just have
to put down their harps to move along with all these new praise
The Great Outdoors beckons. Being outside
brought a loud, undisputed cheer from our group. Whenever possible,
kids want to experience the awesome world that God made while
they’re talking and learning about its Maker. Being outside not
only provides them with new scenery and fresh air, but different
outdoor environments can lend great opportunities to use God’s
natural wonders as learning tools.
Food opens kids’ mouths and minds. Kids love
food at church. They especially love candy, popcorn, cookies,
cupcakes, and everything sweet, tasty, and unhealthy. Kids like
food and want second and third helpings of it. And food can even
drive home spiritual truths when done right. Move from crackers and
Kool-Aid to snacks that make a significant point about your lesson.
Ever thought of burnt offerings in snack form or angel cakes to
make a point?
So what are kids getting at church that they really don’t want?
What provides fodder for that dreaded announcement, “I hate church;
it’s so boring! Do I have to go back?” We asked our focus group
about this, and they had plenty to say.
• Kids don’t want to sit through Big Church. Nothing will more
quickly elicit an “I’m bored!” than an hour or two of sitting in
pews with all the grown-ups. When they’re older, say 12 and up,
kids are much more likely to have the patience and attention span
to sit through prayers and sermons (not to mention the ability to
get something out of the week’s message).
Another facet of Big Church that brought a resounding “Yikes!”
to the group was the practice some churches have of calling all the
kids to the front of the congregation for a “children’s message.”
Nothing will more quickly clamp shut the mouth of a child (or an
adult for that matter) than putting him or her in front of a large
crowd. (A note to parents: Take this input to heart. If your church
provides a class for your child’s age, remember that your child
will ultimately prefer to be there — even if there’s an initial
• Sitting still and quietly in classes ranks high on the
“dislike” list. Having to sit and listen to audiotape stories or
lessons brought an almost painful expression on the kids’ faces.
For the older ones (ages 6 through 10), even sitting through
videotapes was unpopular. Finally, the group asked for no more
“boring” games — ones with no bodily motion or too slow a
• “Reading out of the confusing Bible” is no fun. This was a
response that got plenty of nods throughout the group. Leaders need
to stick to Bible stories and verses that have been modified for
kid-level understanding…then do the reading themselves! Even
better, let the kids act out the story (there’s that
movement/activity again). Most importantly, age-appropriate
application is crucial to the kids actually taking home the Bible
lesson. Determine what the respective ages are dealing with in
their day-to-day lives, and reveal how the lesson can help them
once they walk out of the classroom.
• Saying “goodbye” to a cool teacher is uncool. Along the lines
of asking what kids don’t like, we asked them what about church
makes them sad or angry. This subject provided the most universal
feedback of all: “I don’t like when a cool teacher leaves.” The
kids love, want, and need consistency from their teachers and
leaders. They greatly appreciate and applaud the time, energy, and
enthusiasm teachers put into the class… even though they may
never come out and say so directly. Additionally, the kids are
frustrated when teachers don’t do what they say they’re going to
do. For example, if a leader says, “Next week we’re going to do a
scavenger hunt!” Then, by all means, next week do the scavenger
Building a Dream Church
Building committees often begin their vision for a new church
with a dream. They verbally and visually sketch out what their
ideal building would look like, complete with every bell and
whistle. They say, “If money were no object, this is what we’d
want…” Then after adding a dash of actuality, plus the reality of
budget constraints, they ultimately decide on the real details of
the new structure. In some cases, a few of those dream components
even come to fruition. This process of
dream-big-to-filter-out-what’s-really-important actually works
quite well. And it’s not just for church building committees; it
happens on a daily basis within organizations of every kind.
So we gave it a shot too. We gave each of our focus- group
members a big sheet of white paper, magic markers of every color,
more cookies and juice, and then asked them this one question: “If
you could create your dream church — the best church ever — what
would that be like?” And 15 minutes later, the kids managed to
collectively design the ultimate in children’s church programming.
So all you children’s ministry leaders, listen up! If you want kids
to get excited and stay excited about church, if you want to teach
them about Jesus in ways they’ll not only remember but also be
inspired to tell their friends about, if you want your program to
be fun, then take some cues from our children’s ministry design
- “Church would have lots of outdoor activities. And I would be a
teacher.” — Brianna B., age 7
- “My ideal church has food — and lots of it! We’d watch Bible
movies with lots of popcorn and candy — just like at a movie
theater.” — Trevor G., age 11
- “Kids would have their very own church building, with many
different playrooms. And cakes would be baking! There would be big
trees outside to play in and on.” — Brittney G., age
- “Learning Bible stories would involve playing sports. We would
have lots of show-and-share times.” — David S., age
- “Kids get to be outside and explore and play lots of games.
Kids get to do more crafts and listen to fast music. And we’d get
to bring our pets to class.” — Cassidy W., age 9
- “We would play games, we would eat food, and we would do lots
of crafts.” — Jonathan S., age 8
- “There would be lots of outdoor activities, like scavenger
hunts. We’d play lots of games and sports. We’d do lots of skits
and sing only upbeat songs. We’d also do lots of crafts and watch
some movies. And we’d only say short prayers!” — Karina S.,
- “Church would be held outdoors with the birds and clouds…and
a ladder to climb on whenever we wanted.” — Dean W., age
- “Church would be inside a tree, carved out of the trunk — not
inside a boring building.” — Bret G., age 11
Ideal to Real
Filter out a few “must-haves” based on the input and dreams of
our focus group kids.
- Go outside and play as much as possible.
- Get kids’ bodies moving to keep their minds lively.
- Sing hip, fast songs that are easy to learn — and add
movements whenever you can.
- Let kids create, act, and lead. They really want to help
construct the lesson with you.
- Feed them. Then feed them some more.
Whatever your church’s children’s ministry may be doing — or
not doing now — try to incorporate more of what kids want…and
perhaps a little less of what you think they want. This way, with
confidence you can ask any child at your church, “What do you think
of church?” Then you can watch their bright eyes go wide and a
joyful smile erupt as you hear, “My church is SO FUN!”
Julianne Winkler Smith is a freelance writer in Loveland,
Colorado. Please keep in mind that phone numbers, addresses, and
prices are subject to change.